we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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