i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
