hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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