I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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