worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
