Jerry, you need to find god
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Randomize