I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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