Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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