...so i touched it.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Randomize
