Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Randomize
