Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
