I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
