i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
