Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I just forgot I was standing up.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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