I will die if light touches me.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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