How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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