I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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