Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize