so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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