you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
