whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
