I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
