I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
