just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
