Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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