Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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