I didn't shave. On purpose
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
