Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Randomize
