Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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