I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
