Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Is Oprah even human
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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