you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
