babies were throwing up all over the place
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
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