I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
