The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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