He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
