is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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