did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
her facebook's as public as her vagina
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
