I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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