I wish I only lived at night.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
