This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
