So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
