I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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