so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I think i peed on brittanys purse
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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