i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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