i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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