I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
