I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize