the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
