I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
