i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
