i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
