I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
