I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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